Jeffrey-J-Grillo-Author-Speaker-Success-Coach-Excuse-Assassin-Logo

The question of how to change your future is firmly rooted in the garden of our mind.  Specifically, it is a massive and ever-present plant called “expectation.”

The idea of expectation conjures up the age old question of which came first, the chicken or the egg?  In other words, do our circumstances and present reality determine what our expectations are, or do our long held expectations determine our present reality?

I suppose an argument could be made for either position.  As you might imagine, my purpose is not to engage in argument or contention, so let’s objectively agree that regardless of which came first, the reality is that if we want to change the reality in which we live we can make monumental strides towards the desired end by adjusting our expectations!

Let’s just for the sake of example say that “Bob” finds himself with poor self-esteem and low expectations or success in his life.  Bob has come to the place in his life where he has such expectations because his history shows a long established pattern of failure, bad choices and loss.  How would you encourage your friend Bob to change his fortunes going forward?  Hopefully, you could persuade Bob to get excited about the possibility of success.  Perhaps you could speak to him about the strengths he does possess and inspire him to dig deep into his soul and try again.  I believe you could excite him and help take his eyes out of the rear view mirror and focus on his future enough to help cultivate different expectations.  Reinforcing his newly adopted expectations, you cheer him on to a short term goal and bolster his confidence and reinforce positive expectation.

I could go on, playing this scenario out but I am sure you get the point.  When we make the conscious choice to change our focus and, therefore, change our expectations from failure to success our lives will bear out the better reality.  When we expect to succeed in an area or specific endeavor, our actions will fall in line with what it takes to be a success.  If I want to start a landscaping business, but I don’t really expect to be successful for whatever reason then my actions will be in line with failure.  I will likely not invest in the best equipment or in the best employees.  I will likely not bother to spend the money or time to advertise and market my business because, well, what’s the point?  I’ll just go through the motions and wait for reality to catch up to my expectations.  Conversely, if I fully expect to be successful, my energy level will be high and I will hustle and work my back side off in order to gain customers and earn their satisfied referrals.  I will invest in whatever it takes to get the job done and grow my new company and the end result will be that the new guy on the block is really making a splash in the market!

So, what do you expect?  If your answer is not exciting to you, adjust your expectations!